I share my story to the attentive girl audience; Grace and Anya sigh sympathetically, Yasmin nods pensively, and well, Rebecca looks plain horrified but that's to be expected. She's probably the most straight-laced girl I've ever met but I honestly love and respect her for it. She kind of reminds me of Audrey Hepburn, except less friendly looking.
"So wait, rewind" she says with a puzzled expression, "Did you meet this older man """dancing"""?"
"Okay, Becca, you don't have to keep referring to stripping with air quotes" I laugh it off, "and no, he's my professor, keep up"
This doesn't comfort her in the slightest. She uncrosses her legs and then crosses them again and smooths down her pencil skirt.
Yasmin cuts in, "Okay Eva, this guy is a Grade 1 jerk. Aside from him breaking the LAW, if you're going to embark on an illicit relationship then the first thing you do is lay down the serious stuff. I can't believe he didn't think you would work out he's an MWC"
Anya, struggling to keep her eyes open, and rubbing her cheek adds "If the sex is good, why does it matter?"
Rebecca scoffs.
I consider this for a moment; the sex is fantastic. But I can't bear liars. If he'd have been straight with me all along I might have been a little less pissed. Since my dad lied to my mum and, in fact, the entire family about his affair for 3 years, I've taken male mistruths rather personally.
Still, I can't help but feel massively duped by Professor Player. His web of lies is pretty much an insult to my intelligence and ego; it scares me that people can deceive others so easily. I think back to one particular night where we lay in post-coital bliss, and I told him about my dad coming back to town and the whole family escapade, and how anxious I was about seeing someone who caused so much grief to me and my family. I nestled my head into Dr. Stewart's chest furrow, that lovely space that all men have between pec and armpit, and he stroked my hair and whispered in the darkness "I could never hurt you Eva"
The thought of this makes me ball up my fists to stop myself crying.
"Fucking hell, this really is the Sad Ladies United Together Society"
Grace laughs between tears and outstretches her arms to beckon me into sofa snuggles. I curl up next to Anya and Grace strokes both of our heads in that same comforting way she always used to at school; the restorer of the calm. She looks over at Rebecca, who is now alone on the sofa opposite, still pressing her skirt down to remove non-existant creases.
"Becca, it's been what like three weeks since you and William, does it get any better?"
Rebecca looks up, almost alarmed to have been brought into the Sad Ladies United Together conversation, "Yes of course it does. All I want to do now is make him regret finishing with me for that fat toff"
She covers her mouth after she angrily blurts this out as if she has revealed some awful secret, and then restores her calm expression, "I mean whatever, it is what it is. There are plenty of other eligible batchelors left in London right? Is Prince Harry single yet?"
I laugh at the sincerity of the comment and turn to Anya who is drifting into a sleepy haze by my side. The bruise is spreading from her cheekbone and her under-eye is turning into a dark purple; I've seen the aftermath of Anya's catfights enough times to be desensitised to any war injuries she has, but something about the mascara streaks and the overnight bag in the hallway doesn't add up.
"How's dickhead An?"
She doesn't open her eyes, and instead shrugs and purs languidly, "Dunno Ev, I haven't fucked him in like two weeks"
The answer is vague enough to be interrogated but assertive enough to leave well enough alone; emotions are so high tonight it would be precarious to press her further. Hey, perhaps we're all getting our periods.
We lay silently soaking up the events of the night, and occasionally one of us offers a "FUCK MEN" type of outburst to which we all nod to, that is until Yasmin stands up abruptly:
"Right. I've had enough of this. Sad Ladies United Together no longer. I will not have my friends turn into pathetic, self-pitying losers"
Grace frowns, "Jeez Yaz, can we not be losers together for just one night?"
"No. We cannot. Now listen to me"
I almost try to offer a protest but I'm exhausted from being so angry all day so I lay back and turn my attention to Yasmin.
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